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  • Posts Tagged ‘wisdom’

    Graduation Come and Gone


    2010 - 05.16

    The ceremony was lovely yesterday. It was exciting to see so much talent walk across the stage to receive the recognition that they’ve worked so hard for. The student speakers did a fabulous job of delivering words of wisdom that didn’t sound too cliche.

    The guest speaker was Stephen Lundin, author of “Fish”, “Cats” and “Ubuntu”. I just looked him up and it turns out he actually went to the same High School as I did…not that that really means a whole lot, but it’s kinda cool all the same. My favorite quote that I was able to remember long enough to get a whole of pen and paper was, “Life is too precious to just be passing through.” It struck me because I’ve found myself getting swept up in the motions of life, getting overwhelmed by the to do list, the planning, all the things I say I have to do. He said something to the effect of when you see your life planned out on paper, it’s no longer your life, it’s someone else’s expectations. Because not only can you not really plan your life, but your expectations of yourself change over time. You can’t turn down possibilities just because they aren’t part of your plan. He also said that when you start to feel the edge of change, don’t resist it because change will come no matter what. But if you move with it and work with it, you’ll have the advantage over the ones that resisted the change.

    So my BS: Viz degree is officially completed, soon I will have my piece of paper that says I know stuff. I don’t feel terribly different or considerably more valuable but it does feel pretty awesome to have achieved a huge goal in my life. I’ve been looking back on my college career, wishing I had done more with it, pushed myself harder, focused less on relationships that ended up failing anyway, and gotten more involved with campus activities…but I can’t change what I did. I’m the person I am today because of what I did (and didn’t do) and that will guide what I chose to do in the future, what I place value in.

    So, congratulations MCAD class of 2010!



    Jerry Allen and I

    Jerry Allen, Myself and Abbi Allen

    These two changed my life

    The Facebook Revelation


    2010 - 05.15

    Okay, I remembered what it was that I forgot during yesterday’s post. Kinda glad I momentarily forgot it because it deserves it’s own post. I need to get better about separating what I write about and try and stick with themes so my posts don’t turn into tangled messes like it was yesterday.

    Anyway…

    For the month of May I’ve banned myself from Facebook. Taken it off my phone, off my bookmark tab, cut it out of my internet routine entirely. Big whoop-di-doo right? Yeah I know, sounds super silly.

    My problem with Facebook is that I’m a very compulsive person and Facebook presents all this seemingly important information on the people I know, events going on in my area that it thinks I should care about and gives me an opportunity to broadcast my mental goings on. It’s a very dangerous time sink for me. The thought will cross my mind, “hmmm…I wonder what’s going on in facebook-land?” and I’ll check. Of course, 9.8 times out of 10, it’s clutter, something I didn’t need to know or don’t care about. Sometimes there will be an interesting TEDTalk posted, or a friend invites me to an event I’m interested in, or an update really catches my attention. But usually it’s just mental clutter, extraneous information that I’d be better without.

    Furthermore, my compulsion was turning into an OCD. Five minutes would go by and I’d wonder “Hmm…I wonder what’s going on in facebook-land?” Guess what…nothing new! But I’d check anyway, multiple times a day, just because I could. My new phone didn’t help either. Running Android and rocking all the applications that go with it ment I had easy access to unlimited distractions right in my pocket. I was taking pictures and uploading them from my phone, updating on the go and reading people’s statuses anywhere I had signal. Although I’m making a bigger deal out of it here than it probably was, but my compulsions were starting to bother me.

    So when my friend Alex challenged his friends to give up Facebook for the month of May, I took him up on it. So far, I can say that I haven’t missed much. The people that matter to me know my number so we’ve kept in touch as much as we needed that way. I’ve had time with fewer distractions to do more things that do matter to me, like planning my trip, getting ready for graduation, taking dance classes and getting back into the studio (after I cleaned it, go me!). My productive time has felt less segmented and my attention span has improved. yes the impulse to check is still there, but it’s going away. The extra information that I didn’t realize I didn’t actually care about isn’t getting in the way of things I do care about. It’s kinda spiffy.

    So while none of this is probably new to anyone else, it’s interesting to me. Some people use Facebook religiously, some people can’t imagine life without Facebook even though a few short years ago (which is like dog years in technology) we didn’t have Facebook, it wasn’t a mass marketing tool and we weren’t delusional enough to think that what we had for breakfast is really all that interesting to the 200+ people we call “Friends”.

    They say it takes 3 weeks to form a habit, I wonder how long it takes to break oneself of one like this. Come June I’m hoping that I’ll be broken of this obsessive curiosity and stick to this limited intake of social information. I’m also hoping that my social calendar gets a little more under control and I make more time for myself. We’ll see.

    Hangin’ with the cool cats


    2010 - 03.14

    Yesterday I made my second trek up to The Wildcat Sanctuary. The two hour drive wasn’t as bad as I was thinking it would be. It was nice to just relax, listen to music and ponder what’s going on in my life right now. Always good to have some “me time”, it seems that my introverted nature is lashing back at me and telling me to chill with the socializing.

    To my surprise when I got to the sanctuary I was told I would get to spend the day taking care of the Bengals, something I wasn’t expecting to get to do until next week when I’m getting officially trained in for it. That was an excellent surprise. Trista showed me around the prep room and gave me a quick overview of that area. Then we went to each of the Bungalows and met the cats, talked about any special needs they had and she let me have at it.

    The residents of the first Bungalow gave me the warmest greeting, Tiger ran up my leg and climbed onto my shoulders, purring in my ear and rubbing his adorable furry head on my face, while the others scurried around mewing curiously at the new person in their home. Most of these guys were super friendly and enjoyed human company. Now, I should say that the work I did was not glamorous, cleaning up poo, getting mucked up in the rainny gloom and sniffling from the different kind of cat dander that I’m not used to wasn’t fun by itself. But it felt good helping the cats and making their homes more comfortable.

    In the third bungalow I met Spartacus and Ciega, their stories are really amazing and it’s good to see these animals overcoming the challenges of the life they were given so unfairly. Both of them have examples of the potential birth defects that occur when people try to breed Bengals. As heart breaking as it was to see them initially, it was motivating to see them getting along just fine with their challenges. Ciega always knew when I was in the room with her and paced the perch impatiently until I petted her and said hello. She eagerly butted heads with me when she found where I was. It was so amazing to watch her move from perch to perch with such familiar ease. The third bungalow is also where I met Maui, another cat that is fond of shoulder perching. Unfortunately, he’s a little unsure of his footing because of bad knees (something we have in common, I feel for him) so I have some nice scratches on my neck from where he lost his balance a little. It’s all good though!

    Jumping ahead to Bungalow 6, I got to meet some of the earlier generations of Bengals and the Jungle Cats. This one was particularly intimidating…the cats were bigger than the others (being F1s they were less domestic than most of the ones in the previous areas). I was greeted by Ty, the Chausie who impatiently paced the fence as I approached, hoping I brought more chicken, which I didn’t. When he established that I didn’t have anything interesting, he left me alone for the most part. Here I also met Ledger, appropriately named for the markings on his face that make him look terrifyingly like the Joker from the recent Dark Knight movie. He let me know that I was not welcome near him as he hissed at me from his corner where he was snuggled up with another cat. His eyes were fiercely intelligent and he watched me as I cleaned their boxes, swept and mopped their enclosure. As scared as I was of Ledger, I had to realize that he was more scared of me. Later, as I was putting the linens back in the heated room, Ty had decided to lay on them while I was cleaning so convincing him to move was rather challenging…and terrifying when I insulted him by pulling them out from under him. He hissed and moved indignantly.

    This trip was super exhausting but worth every minute of the long drive. I can’t wait until next week when I get to do it again. I’m pondering the idea of making the trip every Saturday instead of just every other like the original plan was. I might be able to carpool with Trista some weekends so that should help cut down on the gas bill… I hope.

    On another note, I talked to my Externship bosses last week about the next steps now that I’m at the half way point and they agreed that they want to bring me on as a more permanent member of their team. I’m super excited because I absolutely love what I’ve been doing there. The environment is welcoming and encouraging, the people are helpful and inspiring, and the work is stimulating and exciting. I’ve been so remarkably lucky to have had this opportunity and am happy to get a job in the field that I went to school for. I have some things to work on, but John is happy to work with me and give me any pointers I need.

    To celebrate the new job and the fact that I’ll have reliable income out of graduation, I splurged and ordered myself a new 15″ MacBook Pro complete with the Adobe Master Suite CS4 and a fancy wireless Magic Mouse. I am so beyond excited to play with the new toy and get it all set up. I’ll have to come up with a name for it…any suggestions?

    Anyway, time for bed, gotta wake up early in the morning to go running. Trying to make it a point to go three times a week before work and run 40 minutes. Already done one week, so hopefully I’ll keep it up and make it a habit. Hoping to start the TEAM Fitness program they have soon and get down to my goal weight (lose ten pounds) by the time my performance is. Should be no problem, just have to watch what I eat a little more closely and keep up with the working out. Good times!

    The New Year: Some Goals for 2010


    2010 - 01.01

    I hate the idea of making New Years Resolutions. The stat that I found said that 78% of people who make New Years Resolutions fail to follow through with them. The quarter that do, use tools like journaling their progress, asking their friends for support, rewarding milestones and focusing on all the benefits of achieving their goals. (Resource Link)

    But regardless, the idea of making goals for the upcoming year is very appealing. A new year feels like a fresh start, the chance to make changes for the betterment of your life.

    With that in mind, I have made goals for this year. And I’m asking any readers I have out there for help and support. Comments, ideas, recommendations and whatever else you feel like offering, heck, just showing me numbers on Google Analytics is enough to make me happy. :p

    The First goal is to start doing a drawing a day. A concept made known to me by a lovely blogger named Daisy. I attempted this last year and made it about 30 days in before I let life get the better of me. I’m hoping that by making it slightly more official, making daily updates here and getting feedback from readers, I will start making art more a part of my daily life. Currently, I’m working on covering up a journal I wrote in a year or so ago, some therapy for covering up past demons. The journal itself is beautiful with a deep dark blue slip cover and heavy cold-pressed watercolor paper. It was a joy to write in but now I think I can make something more beautiful out of it.

    See! Darn Purdy!

    Some Extra Credit, pages I did about a month ago:

    This is the one I did today:

    The Second goal is to follow the concepts in the book I’m reading at the moment called “The Four Agreements” by don Miguel Ruiz (full book review to come when I finish it). I think Ruiz makes very valid points in this book, providing ways to destress and improve your own life, creating your own heaven. The four agreements you choose to make with yourself are:

    1. Be impeccable with your word
    2. Don’t take anything personally
    3. Don’t make assumptions
    4. Always do your best

    Sounds so simple when it’s just those four ideas written on paper but already today I have felt myself stress out about things I took personally and I made assumptions that put someone in a negative light (I asked for clarity and my assumption was wrong, I felt silly, but was really glad I made the effort to get clarification.) If you haven’t read this book, I highly recommend it.

    Third big goal is to reconnect, get together with friends more often and build stronger friendships based on trust and good experiences. I lost touch with a lot of people over the course of the years I’ve been in college and it’s proven to be a great disservice to me.

    And last but not least, the Fourth goal is to really start working on my career. I start my new job on Monday and it’s going to be amazing. The doors that it will open and the experience I will gain will be limitless. It’s time to put all that hard work done at MCAD to work and start building on it.

    Life is good… very good. I’m blessed with a close family that’s helped me through a lot of hard times and a core group of friends that has stuck by me, I also met some amazing people last year that have welcomed me into their lives with so much joy. 2009 was a really hard year that taught me a lot about myself. I am determined to grow more this year and learn more about what I’m capable of achieving.

    Happy New Year everyone! May 2010 bring you great happiness and success in all your endeavors!

    The Monster inside us all


    2009 - 11.29

    Just finished Season 2 of Dexter this evening. I know I’m a little behind the times and just trying to catch up with this amazing show. But wow, what a ride. If you haven’t seen this show, get on Netflix and watch it all…right now. I’m actually a little grateful that the 3rd season isn’t on play instantly because if it was I’d start it and not get anything done… This way I have to wait until I get the next disk. For those who haven’t seen it, I’m not going to spoil anything, suffice to say that the characters in this show are amazing, the plot is intense and the show never stops giving you little twists along the way.

    Plus, it makes you think about the monsters inside all of us. Sure, not everyone is a serial killer in their free time, but we all make mistakes, do bad things, hurt people we love and keep secrets when we are afraid to face the truth. It’s interesting to think about how there’s a good and bad side to everyone. I have personally been facing a lot of my monsters lately and it certainly isn’t a pretty thing. Ultimately, I’m working on being more honest with myself and the people I care about, learning how to trust again and remembering the value of owning up to mistakes and seeking forgiveness in due time. With any luck, the new visual journal I’ve started will help with this process while also easing me back into the habit of making art.

    I’ve just realized that there are two weeks of classes left. Two more weeks to wrap up projects before I’m off to work on my own. Time to prep for my new job, get back into old hobbies, earn some extra money and spend time with people I’ve been neglecting. I’ve gotten so wrapped up in my own issues lately that I forgot the people that were most important to me.

    Time for bed, just wanted to reflect on some thoughts swimming through my head. Goodnight everyone

    Another year wiser


    2009 - 11.07

    It’s official, I’m another year older as of this past Monday, November 2. Reflecting on what this past year has meant is pretty daunting.  I’ve grown so much as an individual, coming closer to realizing who I am and where I’m going. I’ve gotten to meet so many wonderful people and find myself just over a semester away from getting that marvelous piece of paper that will open countless doors for me. 23 years old, with the rest of my life to look forward to. I wonder what’s next, what new challenges, what new people and what new adventures I have around the corner.

    On another note, I really need to get better about blogging more consistently with more interesting topics of conversation. I’m not too worried yet because I don’t have any readers…at least I don’t think I do…       >.>    <.<

    I guess blogging is still a strange concept to me, it feels entirely too much like the days of old with Livejournal and all the wonderful memories attached to that. I should start reading more blogs to understand what is “good blogging” and what is not so good. People think that being young and mildly tech savvy means you automatically know everything about everything but there is always something to learn, always something uncomfortable about a technology. Everyone is a beginner at some point.

    That’s all for now. More to come soon as I get all this stuff figured out.